You Don't Need a Rock Bottom - You Need Your Own Enough | Ep. 22
Jumping into a pool in my bra and underwear at a 4th of July party wasn't enough. Passing out on my husband's shoulder five minutes into a Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga concert we'd waited eight months for wasn't enough. Saying a cuss word in front of 700 people with their heads bowed in prayer at my husband's work event wasn't enough. But telling my then 23-year-old son to go blank himself while blacked out? That was enough. And I still remember his face the next morning when he told me what I'd said.
In Episode 22 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear gets raw about the moments that weren't enough, the one that finally was, and why the difference had everything to do with identity. This episode isn't just about alcohol. It's about why intelligent, successful people stay stuck long after they know something needs to change, and how to choose your own "enough" before life chooses it for you.
Kari also shares three client stories of "enough" moments: the business trip that went too far, the wife who finally walked out, and the doctor who delivered news that couldn't be ignored. Every person's enough is different. The question is whether you'll choose yours or wait for it to choose you.
In this episode you'll hear:
• The three embarrassing stories that still weren't enough for Kari to change
• The one moment that was, and why it hit differently than all the others
• Why none of those earlier moments changed her identity, but the night with her son did
• The neuroscience behind why our brains prefer unhealthy familiar over healthy unfamiliar
• Why you keep comparing yourself to people who are worse off instead of people who are healthy
• Three real client stories of "enough" moments: the business trip, the packed bag, the doctor's warning
• Why most people aren't waiting for rock bottom, they're waiting for certainty
• The leadership parallel: why leaders pivot fast in business but wait years in their personal lives
• How the seed of change works, and why it took Kari two years of seeds before she acted
• Questions to sit with this week that might help you find your own enough
If you've been thinking about something you know needs to change but you keep telling yourself "it's not that bad," this episode is going to hold up a mirror. And maybe today is your enough.
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FREE RESOURCES
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FREE RESOURCES
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TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT -Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
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Download the free pocket-sized field guide of 28 practical tools men can reach for the moment they're tempted to drink, the days they're trying to build differently, and the deeper identity questions underneath both.
👉 28 Tools: Question the Drink
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/
Download the free pocket-sized field guide of 28 practical tools men can reach for the moment they're tempted to drink, the days they're trying to build differently, and the deeper identity questions underneath both.
👉 28 Tools: Question the Drink
Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.
Book a Call with Kari:
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CONNECT WITH KARI
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/
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EPISODES REFERENCED
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TOPICS COVERED
rock bottom myth, you don't need a rock bottom, gray area drinking, enough moment, why people stay stuck, identity and change, choosing to change, midlife change, quit drinking story, embarrassing drunk stories, high performers and alcohol, brain and habits, neuroscience of change, comparing yourself to others, seed of change, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, agency and change, personal leadership, gray area drinker, sober curious
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If you know someone who keeps saying "it's not that bad," send them this episode. Sometimes hearing someone else's "enough" is the mirror that helps them find their own.
#WhatsYourEnough #YouDontNeedARockBottom #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #ChooseYourEnough #QuitDrinking #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #IdentityShift #SoberCurious #EnoughIsEnough #PersonalLeadership #StopWaiting #SeedOfChange #AlcoholFree
